Surf naked, and get paid for it

At the search engine site voyeur.mckinley.com/cgi.bin/voyeur.cgi, you can see what your fellow web surfers are searching for. Besides making you feel very smug about your spelling abilities, you can learn a lot about human nature here, mainly that everybody online wants one of the following three things � money, naked pictures or something for nothing.

Assuming country fans are no different, I have some good news. I haven't been able to track down any pictures of unclothed country stars (but rest assured, research will continue), but I did find a place where you can get paid for listening to country music: www.praia.com/radio/. It pays the whopping salary of 20 cents an hour. (I would do this myself, but I don't need to moonlight any more; since editor Jeff Remz gave me that raise I make almost double that per hour.)

And there's plenty of free stuff on the web too. You can get all the country and western screensavers and wallpaper and such like you want at http://countrymusic.about.com/ (look under fun stuff.)

At http://elvispelvis.com/fullerup.htm, you can find out all the gory details on how your favorite rock or country musician bought the farm. You can search by name or by cause of death. (Country musicians are woefully underrepresented in the drug overdose field, but thanks to stars like Dottie West, Red Sovine, Johnny Horton and Rex Allen Sr. they completely dominate the car crash category.) And fullerup.com links to findagrave.com, where you can do just that � or purchase a tasteful Findagrave T-shirt.

By the way, fullerup.com takes its name from Bobby ("I Fought the Law") Fuller, who died after being forced to drink petroleum. Ironically, this happened shortly after his career ran out of gas.

If all that's more morbid than you care for, than surf on over to www.gilchriststudios.com/nancy/celeb. Guy Gilchrist, who does the syndicated Nancy comic strip, is apparently a big time country fan, and he works country stars into the strip every chance he gets. Usually it's Nancy or her Aunt Fritzi or her friend wearing a Reba T-shirt or admiring a Travis Tritt poster, but Wynonna liked one of her strips so much she sent the artist an autographed photo. (See both on celebrity page one). There's an incredibly corny but cute Dixie Chicks gag on the third celebrity page, and on the 19th strip on the second celebrity page (entitled "Country Jam"), Gilchrist pulls off the impossible � he packs 12 country and western puns into one panel.

That's all for now, have fun out there. And if you have any pictures of Patty Loveless sunbathing, call me.